Knock the stupid right out of me.

Last night my mother-in-laws best friend Cori dropped by to drop off her old kitchen table. They got a new one and offered us their old one. I heard a knock at the door and she was afraid at first that she had woken us up because the house was dark, but I was just getting the kids to bed. My wife was out with my mom and my sister at the movies watching some cheesy girl singing show called Lalalulu, or something like that. Maybe it was dancey pantsy? It was some musical show with some girl singing. Anyways, I'm sure I wouldn't like it so I didn't miss much. Ok, where was I? Oh yeah, the table. So Cori and her husband Randy dropped off the table and offered to help me take it inside and I just told them to leave it on the front lawn and I will have Emily help me when she got home. I needed to haul the other one outside anyways.
So as soon as they took off I hauled our old one outside and I picked the new one up which was quite the workout. And as Cori had told me the table was very, very solid and very, very heavy. I should have probably waited for Emily to come home and help me take it in, but I love surprising her and I wanted to see her surprised when she walked into the kitchen. I had managed to get the table in through the backdoor, I'm not sure how I did that without denting or scratching it. It was pretty heavy. And then I went back and I proceeded to grab the benches. As I was walking back along the driveway with the first bench it was pretty light compared to the table so I was moving a lot quicker with it and I was trying to hurry and get it inside before Emily got home. In my rush I had the bench held out in front of me and it was the length of my body so I couldn't see around it too well. All of the sudden the leg hit the garage window seal and caused the bench to come to a sudden halt as I was still moving at a pretty quick pace. Needless to say I managed not to drop the bench although I was swaying from side to side from the impact of my face meeting the bench.
It caught me right on the corner of my left eye and about caused me to black out for a minute. Although now dizzy, I still managed to get the bench in the house. I then went slower with the next bench. I managed to get everything in the house and by this time my head was throbbing and I could barely see out of my left eye. The thought came to my mind, "I could have passed out in the driveway with the front door right open and the kids asleep in their beds." Scary thought. I then text Emily that I had a major headache and she text back, "Migraine?" and I replied back, "Let's just say that my eye looks like Buddy's eye. (he has an eye infection right now). She then text back, "That's sad." and I said, "Yes, it is not neat when face meets wood." She then text back, "Huh?"
Emily came home and I still hadn't passed out so I guess I was Ok. She was happily surprised to see our new table and benches. I came out with a headache and a very sore eye. Moral of the story- never try to surprise wife again.

My cravings.

1. V8 juice. I love most vegetables and this is the perfect blend. I love most tomato based substances.

2. Pickles. It's been an uphill battle for me trying to find the perfect pickle. I can't tell you how many brands I have tried. You know when you are looking for a pickle that is crispy with a natural flavor. I have tried some with weird texture and skin, like the Vlassic brand. Nalley's are really crispy but they have a weak pickle flavor. My quest for the perfect pickles has ended today. They are a little bit pricier than the other brands, but they are so worth it. The crispness is unbelievable, the flavor just explodes in your mouth. I present you all with the Claussen pickle. Believe me, you will never go back to any other brand again.

3. Coke. I love a good Coke in the morning, and at night. And pretty much throughout the whole day. I like a nice cold Coke that has a loud crack when you open it. My wife can hear this sound when she is laying in the bedroom with the door closed and the TV on. She always gets the first sip.

4. Mountain Dew. Mountain Dew is a good all-around beverage. There's never much of a burn to it, just a really good taste. For the rare moments when I need a break from Coke I can turn to the Dew.

5. Blue Demon Full Throttle. Probably the only energy drink that I really care for.

6. Sherbet. I have never been much of a fan of ice cream.

7. Lemon Meringue pie. This is my favorite pie at Thanksgiving, and I usually ask for it when it is my birthday as well.

8. Oysters. I have to buy these at least once a month. I have to buy a few because my girls love them too. Although I am getting very upset because they keep raising the prices on them.

9. Rice. I love rice and I could eat it with almost every meal. It's the new potato.

10. Trout. Best with rice.

11. Hot Dogs. I don't know why, maybe it's because I was raised on them, but I just love these little suckers. I really love Brats, but sometimes I just want a cheap hot dog. That sounds dirty..

12. Spaghettio's. I try not to eat them because they are easy lunches for the girl's, but now and then I have to have a can. And if you don't want to pay the expensive price buy Spaghetti Rings they taste just as good.

13. Jalapeno stuffed Olives. My friend at work recently got me addicted to these. Very good, everyone should try them.

14. Pickled Asparagus. Once again, a friend at work introduced these to me and I can never find them. I heard Albertson's carries them. If anyone knows where I can get these, let me know.

15. Jalapenos. On sandwiches, on nachos, on just about anything.

16. Salsa and Chips. Everyday I have to choose between kissing my wife or eating salsa and chips. I really love salsa, but I really love kissing my wife. It's a debate.

17. Garlic. The stronger the garlic flavor, the better. This goes with my love of most tomato based substances.

18. Tomatoes. I can eat a tomato like people do apples. The only fruit I really enjoy.

19. Turkey. I love how it smells when it is cooking. I love the taste of it. I just love it. Thanksgiving does happen to be my favorite holiday.

20. Apple Pie. Not a fan of a lot of apple pies, but my wife's homemade apple pie is awesome.

21. Swedish Fish and Sour Patch Kids. A childhood treat that I still love.

22. Pizza. My favorite kind is one with mushroom's, olives, and sausage.

23. Chinese. Every so often I get a craving for Chinese food. There's not much about the food that I don't like.

24. Lasagna. My wife's homemade lasagna is the best in my opinion. A dinner option you can never go wrong with.

25. Chicken Enchiladas. Once again, my wife's recipe.